


So Alone

by Siriusfan13



Category: Batman Beyond
Genre: F/M, One Shot, Spoilers for "Touch of Curare", Spoilers for Return of the Joker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:21:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25009888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siriusfan13/pseuds/Siriusfan13
Summary: One shot. Set around the time of the episode 'Touch of Curare.' It's a deadly game to be playing, but if you insist on playing to the end, I won't fold. Barbara Gordon's reflections.  Please R&R!
Relationships: Barbara Gordon/Bruce Wayne
Kudos: 2





	So Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Batman or the Batman Beyond universe. And just for the record, the last two lines are a direct quote from "Touch of Curare." This fic is set sometime during that episode.

" **So Alone"**

You're such a bastard. You know that right? I'm holding all the cards. _All_ of them! But Joker's wild, and that's the only one you need. And you always had the Joker, didn't you?

... Sorry... I know. It was a bad joke.

Now you have me right where you want me. I could arrest _both_ of you. I've been trying to tell myself how satisfying it would be, but I don't lie nearly as convincingly to myself as I thought I did. I see through my own ruses almost as well as you do. Arresting you won't do anything. I already know that. But if I arrest your little protege, you'd stop. You'd _have_ to. You'd slip back into retirement. Fade back into the woodwork.

I know it wouldn't help. That it could destroy everything you've brought out in that kid. That it would definitely destroy you.

But, God, I want to do it. Then I wouldn't have to worry every night about him being caught and tortured like Tim was. Or getting himself killed like Jason.

I wouldn't have to worry about him leaving you alone, like Dick. Like me.

Yes, Bruce. I know your demons. You trust no one. You don't get close because close hurts. Love hurts.

I know that personally.

But whether you'll admit it or not, you've let yourself get close to this one. I didn't realize it until tonight, when I threatened him with jail again. I figured he'd eventually be scared off by the idea of having to serve more time. I almost thought it was working. He's always seemed uncomfortable when I threatened to arrest you two. Can't say that I blame him. It's what I expected.

Then he surprised me. He asked me why I hate you, Bruce. Ironic, isn't it? I'm one of the only people left who really knows you; who understands and wants to protect you… And he thinks I hate you.

So, I told him the truth about us. Figured if nothing else, he'd see how you are and back off.

I was wrong.

He watched me like a hawk while I spoke. He really listened. Really cared. Not because of what I went through. No, Bruce. He was worried about _you_. And I suddenly realized that all my threats of jail time had never fazed him. He didn't care about himself. How could he, with the life he's chosen to lead? He was trying to keep _you_ out of trouble. Just like I always have.

Dammit, how can he be just like both you _and_ me when we're both so different? But he is.

My threats are empty now. He knows I'm not going to arrest either of you.

I don't know what to do. I've played my out my hand. And as always, you hold the wild card. Now all I can do is wait and see if your wild card makes you the victor. If it can hold out against other wilder, more dangerous Jokerz. I'll just have to keep playing even if I can't beat you at your own game, because I sure as hell won't fold.

Never...

I gave up my ace to him, you know. I gave him the one thing that you never knew for sure...

He knows I don't hate you. I only hate what you've become…

Such a great man… So alone…

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: I have no idea what I was going for here. "Touch of Curare" is one of my favorite episodes, and the last few lines here are some of my favorite from the entire series… But honestly, I was cleaning the house when out of nowhere I felt like writing something with those lines. This is what came out of it. I hope you like it. Personally, I'm still just trying to figure it out…


End file.
